What is going on here?

Obviously it's hard to get back into writing when you take the summer off. Got to keep the momentum together. Here are some simple thoughts for the day.

Has God ever led you into the wilderness? I am not referring to the physical wilderness but the spiritual wilderness. What was it like there? What did God desire to teach you? Were you ready? Did you listen? Are you still there?

I feel like God leads me there every time I begin to feel comfortable. Any little stretch of rest seems like only a preparation for my next wilderness experience. Perhaps this is the only way for God to fully get my attention. Am I that stubborn and thick headed? Ya well probably.

Where are you in your spiritual journey today? A desert? An oasis? A plateau? An ocean?

I'm back!!!

It's been a crazy busy summer. But I'm back now. Going to get the blog back and going a few times a week now. You'll see my pic here with my great hair from VBS. It was a great time and lots of kids. It led us to feel that we were being called to start an Awanas ministry.



Awanas is focused on scripture memory. Which gets me thinking about our commitment to the Word of God. As a child I remember being told the importance and taught the reverence for the Word. I was challenged to memorize verses and even chapters. I was asked to repeat the stories and poems. But now as an adult, no one asks me to do these things. When I teach the youth or share the Gospel with other, those things come in to play. Yet these are not imposed from an external force. In fact there is a message that says - I need not worry about such petty things. Even more so - the Bible is about me, my feelings, and improving me.

By now your brain should be saying "uh...NO!". Scripture is God's story. Scripture is God's love given for me, but it's not about me. It's about Christ. It's about the Father. It's about the Spirit. It's about sacrifice, patience, waiting, creation, movement, beauty, and love. No one will be giving us stickers for memorizing the scriptures this week, but perhaps it will stick on our hearts. No one will give us a gold star, but perhaps we will realize the treasure that is scripture. No one will pat us on the back, but perhaps we will realize the embrace of God.

Hey wimp!

I have been reading Paul's letters quite a bit lately. At first it was for prepping a Bible study but then I left my personal study of Luke to jump into what Paul is saying. Let me just say I have a huge issue. I have heard a lot of messages that water down Paul's message. It seems to me that Paul has really high standards for Christians. Yet I have heard many messages and read many books that make excuses for Paul's standards. "We are sinners and can't help it," seems to be the mentality. Paul doesn't by it. He calls the people out on the carpet over and over and over. Did they sin? Of course! But Paul did not excuse it. He said it's time to change. Paul sets high standards for getting along, marriage, lawsuits, food, worship, the Lord's supper, love, spiritual gifts, forgiveness, and generosity to name a few. I have to believe that these things are applicable to me as a follower of Christ. We need a detox from the 'Christian wimp' mentality. We have set low standards but that must change. Will we sin? Of course! But we do not have to be stuck there.

1 Corinthians 1:8-9 'He will keep you strong to the end, so that you will be blameless on the day of our Lord Jesus Christ. God, who has called you into fellowship with his Son Jesus Christ our Lord, is faithful.'

We have been saved by grace. We have been given this gift. How will we respond? In weakness or in the strength that comes from Christ himself?

Devotion

The disciples "devoted themselves to the apostles' teaching and to the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer." Acts 2:42

A thought crossed my mind today. Perhaps a prompting of the Holy Spirit. What if God called you to give up all movies, tv, books, etc and asked you to study the scriptures only? What if we were to give up video games, surfing the internet, and tuning out the world with mp3's and devoted ourselves to building up the body of Christ? What if we were to give up a little sleep, that cherished latte, and our comfy couches and dedicated ourselves to worship and Bible study together on Sundays? What if we gave up our sins, our faults, our pride, our grudges, and our lives and devoted ourselves to prayer?

What if when Acts says the disciples devoted themselves, it was actually true?

We have to ask ourselves...are we disciples? Really and truly?

Into the Garden

Jesus comes to Gethsemane in the dark. He steps into the darkness of the Garden knowing that there is no other way. For us who desire to follow Christ – there is no other way. We too must make our way into darkness of the Garden.

Jesus knew he was called to die, to surrender fully to God. We are called to die, to put to death the sin in our lives, to fully surrender to God’s will, to walk away from our past.

But we are the disciples falling asleep when we should be in prayer. We are an unwilling lot, clinging to our old lives. We find comfort in our sin. We find solace in our dysfunction. The cross becomes our crutch. Grace becomes our excuse.

Let this be no more.

Tonight let us enter the garden.

However fearful we might be let us come into the garden.

However reluctant we might be let us come into the garden.

Tonight let us put to death our selfish pride, our greed, our anger, our darkest sin.

Tonight in the garden let us lay bare our souls before God.

Let us fall to our knees and pray that God’s will might be done.

Let us pray

Joyless Living

Things are easy to get caught up in...things like sports teams. Have a favorite? Maybe you are a fanatic. A favorite pasttime? Perhaps you can't get enough fishing, reading, or piano time. I am guilty. My often involve inward journeys. I get caught up in worry, self-hatred, negativity, and doubt. My one track mind likes to play out the worst case scenero for everything. So a confession is forthwith coming. For the longest time I have been caught up in the whirlwind of the postmodern, what's-wrong-with-the-organized-church, the sky is falling discussion. In all of my reading, discussions, and complaints - has this helped me to grow? Grow more cynical perhaps. Grow angry at the errors of our ways. Angry at government or leaders. Much of what is being publised by Christian publishers fuels this fire. I grab a book know that it will grow my discontent but I read it anyway. Is my anger righteous? Is my frustration founded? Perhaps. More likely it is piety and pride.

See I am the chief of sinners. I can point out your sin, the churches sin, and the world's sin. Yet I cannot face myself in the mirror. I cannot stand before God and say "here is my sin Lord". Because that would require surrender. That would require me to die to myself.

Yet here I find myself in the midst of Grace. God who is faithful and just is willing to forgive. Willing to say "my child I love you and I forgive you." Now I must face the mirror. I must fall on my knees before the cross.

The truth is I will probably not cause the next revival. I will not save the world. In fact I cannot even save myself. It is God who loves and acts and moves in and through me that brings about any good. It is God who saves. I am looking at the plank in my eye and asking God to remove it. I desire to serve and obey. The church may not be perfect. It may be modern and the world may be passing it by. But is my love. It is my home. It is where grace falls like rain. It is where I shall live in joy all the days of my life.

What is Revolution?

Matthew 10:39 Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.

It is time to find our lives in Christ.

Revolution is:

Compassion - Love for our neighbors. Sharing the Gospel with all that we meet. In our words and our actions. Caring for the needs of those we encounter. Do our words and actions toward others reflect a life found in Christ?

Commitment - To the youth ministry, to the church, to Christ. For too long we have found our lives in this world and not in God's. We must find our lives in Christ. Do your calendar, schedule, activities...reflect a life found in Christ?

Church - It's the bigger church. Not just youth group, but getting up Sunday mornings to be with the larger church. It is coming to Lent suppers, pancake breakfasts, and church picnics. You are a part of the body of Christ!

The Cross - It's all about Jesus. Everything we do - the fun, the tough, the retreats, the Bible studies, all of it is in response to the great love and sacrifice of Christ.

Where do you find your life?

Never Forgive or Forget

I am sitting in my "other office" right now...you guessed it. Moxie Java. I was working on Andrew Night for a while but this guy across from me is wearing a shirt that is distracting me. It says "We will never forget or forgive. 9/11/01". This got me thinking about forgiveness. In high school youth two weeks ago, the topic of forgiveness came up. The consensus was that it is hard to forgive yourself. If we have trouble forgiving ourselves, it's no wonder we have trouble forgiving others.

This guys tshirt might not be "kind" but it's pretty honest. When someone hurts me, my reaction is to harbor that pain, dwell on it, and get defensive. I don't just extend a heart of forgiveness as I should. I have that Peter attitude from Matthew 18. "How many times am I supposed to forgive?" Isn't there a statute of limitations on this?

I think this is one of the reasons Jesus was so radical. He would look at someone who had been hurt (the woman at the well) or had hurt others (Zaccheus), then just forgive them. It's uncomfortable and invasive. It's amazing and heart changing. When Jesus looks at you and tells you that you are loved and forgiven, something breaks free within. The hard shell of jaded life cracks. Then bit by bit you learn to forgive. You get hurt. You look back at Jesus, urging you to love. Then bit by bit you extend your heart, knowing that you - the chief of sinners - has been forgiven.

What does it mean to be a Christian?

I asked this question in Sunday school last week. Everyone in class felt it was a difficult question to answer. But what does it mean?

We looked at Romans 5. Verse 1 says this: "Therefore being justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ." I don't usually just pull a verse out by itself but there is something significant here. Peace.

Sadly in our day we usually find little peace. The noise grows around us - voices, technology, and industry. There are more billboards and neon signs every day. Speed is valued. Bigger is always better. More means greater.

Then we look at our lives, our inner lives. Do we find peace? How can we with all that is going on around us? The pace of life and the stress of life. The broken relationships and disappointments. What is there to cling to? Peace.

What does it mean to be a Christian? It means peace with God through Christ. In a life that can overwhelm us. Peace. In a life that pass us by in an instant. Peace. In a life that has moments of fleeting joy. Peace. In a life that sometimes makes sense and sometimes makes no sense. Peace.

Peace with God through Christ.

What are you putting in your brain?

With the Superbowl coming up, I hear a lot of people say they watch for the commercials.

How about last years...a beer that lets you breath fire or fly. A tire commercial where Richard Simmons is nearly hit on a dark road. The horse training montage? The Audi commercial that spoofs the Godfather movie. Shipping problems solved with pigeons. The Pepsi Max commercial where people are falling asleep until they get Pepsi Max. Or Justin Timberlake being abused as he flies across the city.

Everywhere we go, there is input being shoved into our brains. Radio, television, billboards, video games, tshirts, neon signs, and the list goes on. So I wonder what are we putting in our brains?

Here is my Superbowl challenge to you. Take one of those commercials that you see and find truth in it. Find something that you can relate back to scripture. Then tell me about it.

Soundtrack

Pastor Tom hit on this a couple of weeks ago. If you had to pick a soundtrack for your life - a song or a couple of songs - what would they be and why?

Some that have defined me in the past:
In times of faith struggle - Straylight Run: For the Best
and U2: I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For
When everything thing seems to be a jumbled mess in my head - Audioslave: Doesn't Remind Me
Trying to start over after messing up - Augustana: Boston
Depression - any song by Jakob Dylan or the Wallflowers

Today I would say two songs- The Beatles: Let It Be

I am the king of worry. There are none that parallel my prowess when it comes to anxiety. God knows this about me. In fact He is probably amused by the lengths that I will go to obsess over a simple issue. Yet He is there always saying "let it be", for He is in control. Sometimes I feel pretty small for the way I don't trust. So thanks to John, Paul, George and Ringo for reminding me that I don't have to be big because God is.

Straylight Run: Your Name (Sunrise Highway)

This is a song about direction. I want to pretend that I have it all together, as though I have arrived. Nothing could be further from the truth. I have so much growing to do. Standing in the face of change is scary. You look at past mistakes and think "well it's not my fault because _________". Then the longer you look, the more you realize that it is your fault and you need to change. Everything about us resists change and growth. Look at Jonah, Moses, Abraham, and countless other reluctant leaders in scripture. Excuses, resistance, reasons, cop outs, whatever it takes.

What is your soundtrack?

Honesty before God

There is no fooling God. He sees us for who we are. The truth of our sin and the beauty of our newness in Christ.

Christ asks the disciples "Who do you say that I am?"

I think we need to ask ourselves the same question. "Who am I?"

When we are honest we can begin to leave behind the past and live more fully in Christ.

It is a constant examination of the soul. St. Ignatius called it awareness. St. Paul calls us to do it constantly.

Today make your prayer one of honesty. Confess your sin in full. See the new creation you are in Christ. Living in truth. Let your light shine.

Awe

One of the great debates lately is whether scripture is relevant. Does God still have something to say? Or is God still relevant?

I have a question that might help us - What is awe? What inspires, shocks, gives greater meaning, knocks us off our feet, grabs us, throws us into the sacred?

The experience of the shepherds in the fields...awe

God speaking life into existance...awe

David taking on a giant...awe

Paul giving thanks from a jail cell...awe

A sunrise, a sunset, a quiet moment, a prayer, a moment of peace, a hug...awe

What is your moment of awe? God is the originator of all this. Looking back in your life, when you see the amazing above the mundane, there God is.

Exhausted

definition - to be consumed entirely

Yup. That's where I am. It's been a long year. A year in which I have lost family and friends. A year in which I have worried for the health of those around me. A year of retreats, youth groups, concerts, corn mazes, devotions, river floats, youth rallys, silence, lock-in's, pizza, mini-golf, prayers, song, meetings, worship, laughter, mission trips, reading, training, deep conversations, text messaging, instant messaging, email messaging, voice messenging...

So I have to ask, why? Why do we do any of these things? There is only one reason - Christ.

Christ our redeemer - who purchased us in blood.

Christ our brother - who embraces us when we fall.

Christ our comforter - who knows the tears we cry.

Christ our Savior - who gave all that we might live.

As the year comes to and end let us find rest in Christ.

Moments

Our lives are filled with sacred moments. Often we are too distracted to see them. The moments pass us. Sacred moments go unnoticed. God goes unnoticed.

In the breeze.

In the sunshine.

In our meals.

In our rest.

In the music.

In the quiet.

Slow down and notice the sacred moments. God is present. Shouldn't you be?

Downtime

Started reading a book called Downtime. It's all about prayer. Which gets me to thinking about the condition of my soul. I don't have a typical schedule so I usually count my weeks starting on Saturday. I run from Saturday to Thursday non-stop - planning, prep, phone calls, events, meetings, text messages, emails, reading, files, meals, friends, family time and on it goes... I take Friday's off, but usually end up doing errands or work around the house. Last week I had an extra day with Thanksgiving. I just dropped. I was exhausted. Downtime has been a foreign word to me. I am not talking about wasting time but rather time spend in the still quiet, the loving arms of God, the beauty of creation, the echo of the scriptures. Now I am where I quiet often find myself - in a desert place. I think this is THE struggle. The Chaos of Life vs. The Calling of God. John talks about abiding. God calls us to abide in Him. To be. It's not a productive state according to the world's standards. No money is made when we spend time in God. No school work is done. Chores, phone calls, to-do lists, all must wait. Yet it is essential to our souls. If we wish to carry the spark of life that is so often taken from us, we must abide. We cannot approach prayer as though it were an aquisition. Dear God please grant me the following : ___________, _____________, and ______________. This is no connection, no relationship. This is not abiding. Being with God, being in God's presence is THE reason we are here. We were created to BE with God, of God, and in God's fullness. The world will keep on dragging us away, convincing us otherwise. It will tear us apart, chew us up and spit us out into tiny useless pieces that we then try to put back together. Wholeness, holiness cannot be found in anything else. Abide my friends, for that is where we are called.

The Reeds

I shared this story on Sunday but here it is for those of you who might have missed.

My friend Brad died when his car jumped the median on I-5 south of Portland. He was young.

This loss struck me differently than others. I am poor at dealing with loss. I keep it all inside until it comes out as anger or fear. In I way I wish I was better at dealing with loss...in a way I'm not. I kept the loss bottled up inside of me all summer while working at camp.

One night when the sky was clear and the moon was nearly full, I walked down to this little wood bridge that went over a stream. Looking at the water flowing below me I just had this sense of how quickly life just rushes past. I began to cry for Brad, for everyone I had lost, for all the past hurt in my life.

Through my tears I noticed these reeds right near the water. Just barely moving in the wind. I felt like God was trying to show me something. Here was this reed, just being, just peaceful as the stream continued to flow by. It was though God was there, just in the whisper, letting me know that everything would be ok.

Will you see the reeds?
Or loose yourself in the tears?

Goodbye Coffee Shop

Today I went to the office for a while, then to lunch with Mike Matson to plan out the upcoming flag football/bbq event. After that I thought I will go to my favorite coffee shop - Espresso Italia and then I will plan out youth group and work on the youth led worship. I pulled into a spot right outside the front door. Always feels good. Strutting my way to the door, I can almost taste my delishous hazelnut latte. I nod at a lady who is making her way to Fitness 19. Then I pull on the door handle expecting it to give way to warmth and java. But it doesn't budge. The door is locked. I look up and realize - it's gone! Just like that. Vanished. No warning. I am bummed. I have ventured over to this place called The Perks of Life, but you know it's just not the same.

Change...all around us, all the time. We pretend like it isn't. But we are in a constant state of loss and discovery. Pehaps this is part of the beauty of life. However I often find myslef so caught up in loss that I forget to discover.

Jesus talked about discover often. He seemed to know that the mysteries and suprizes in life are often what make it worth while. He turned water into wine, raised people from the dead, fed 1000's with little, cried, crept away into the hills to pray, went sailing, flipped over tables, and gave what no one else could.

What will you discover today?

How will God suprize you? Are you listening? Are you looking?

Masks

From Sunday morning Bible study last week -

Why do we hide who we really are?

What are we afraid of?

God claims us as His own. Can we lay down our masks?

Words

How many more words do we need?

To express faith, to understand faith, to know God?

Billions, millions, 10's of thousands...none?